A Call To Arms

There are certain sites that are going to try to convince you that the scrunchie is making a comeback.

It's not happening. 

If you are still wearing a scrunchie, for the love of people with eyes, give it up.  If you need to pull your hair back, that's why God Goody invented hair bands. And why barrettes, bobby pins, and headbands exist. 

Sure, you might see the occasional scrunchie on Gossip Girl or some other WB hideousness show.  School Girl Prep does seem to lend itself to scrunchies and penny loafers.  But seeing Blair Waldorf wear someone does not a great style make.  It's a COSTUME, people.  So it's supposed to be a little over the top, perhaps?

Thank you, likes of American Apparel, for confirming what I already know: if it's marketed to hipsters, I don't want any.

I don't give a damn if the things are made from the hair of unicorns and held together by the tears of virgins, they're hideous, dated, and unacceptable on girls or women of any age.

Scrunchies are the scourge of our nation and I will not rest until every last one has been eradicated from the planet.  Who's with me?