Sandal Season

Raise your hand if you think it's sandal season.

*crickets from approximately 3/4 of the US*

Yeah, I thought so.  In Cali, the weather is HINTING at sandal season, but I know that's not the case elsewhere.

So, for all of you who won't be wearing sandals any time soon, I present to you Some Of The Ugliest Sandals Of The Season.  You know, so you don't feel like you're missing anything (besides vitamin D and daylight generally).

This is a Gypsy Macrame Sandal.  It's $225.  Seriously, people, I can't make shit up that's this good ridiculous.

This "Stoneham" sandal is $109.95. I don't think I've seen sandals this ugly since the 90s.  On men.  For increased ugliness, check them out in black.

This is a $75 jelly sandal.  I don't give a rat's arse whose label is on these, they are PLASTIC SHOES.  Therefore, should you choose the juvenile route of plastic shoes, they shouldn't cost more than $14.99- at Target.

Don't know about you, but these look vaguely spider-like and any shoe that contains or looks like a bug is off my list.

Oh, yay. A bedazzler threw up on these shoes.

And this, gentle readers, is the "indie" sandal for $79.95.  Because this is inexplicable to me, I leave it to you to decide what the eff this is for.  Cold ankles but warm toes?  Whatever it 's for, it looks stupid.